Happy 4th.

I wish I had been able to make it to Foutch 4th Fest. But sadly work called. On the plus side all kinds of stuff was canceled today so my day was way easier than anticipated. I think I am going to get payback for that from the EMS gods come tomorrow though. Just a feeling.

Too many noise makers going off in the neighborhood so sleeping is difficult at best. Very annoying when you work all weekend. Oh well. One more day of work then a couple days off.

I am being moved to night shift. On July 20th actually. Not looking forward to that since it will be a pain in the ass to readjust my schedule. I really don't want to spend my days sleeping, but i have no choice in the matter. the decision was handed down to us from on high. I will be working 7pm to 7am from the 20th until they tell me i can go back to my day shift basically. There is a possibility this could be temporary (like 3-6 months) but still annoying. I just keep trying to look on the positive, it is just more experience that i can use to my advantage should I want to move on in the dispatching world.

Going to try and go to bed, but there is a part of me that just wants to go outside with a rifle shoot off some rounds and tell my neighborhood to shut it. ^_^ No, i am not very patriotic... don't really care either.

^_^

Back from Japan. It was awesome.

I met two loli-chan's at Tokyo Disney. It was great. They were both in full Angelic Pretty. They were super nice, and let me take pictures. They seemed a bit confused by the gaijin asking them about the Brand they were wearing but they took it well.

Went all over. Finally went to an h.Naoto store. It was as awesome as I expected.

Did the Shrine and Temple thing. Saw some incredible things. Stayed in a 200 year old Japanese Traditional Inn, slept on a futon. Got fairly badly injured while there, but recovering fairly well. Learned that the British phase "mind the gap" applies in Japan as well.

Way more than that happened but I'm tired, have to work 12 hours tomorrow and don't feel like reliving an amazing trip with inadequate language. ^_^

Im back, more or less in one piece and I can't wait to go back to Japan.

I leave for a 2 week vacation to JAPAN tomorrow morning at 0600.

I am very excited.

I should probably finish packing tonight when i get off work...

Whee procrastination.

Well Finally some time to sit down and relax.

Actually no, the boxes are making me feel claustrophobic. I need to unpack like nobodies business! Soon the boxes will become sentient then they will plot my downfall. I need to get them emptied and broken down then tossed.

Yes I am on crack, this last week was hellish too much stress and I am feeling like my boxes are plotting behind my back. That and the laundry is looking at me rather suspiciously.

Anyway! I own a home now. I will put up pictures soon i promise. But really the best bet is just to come see the condo for yourselves. I am totally unreliable about pictures. I am pleased cause Ramshaw realty is really on the ball with showing my apartment. I am hoping this means there is alot of need for a 2 bedroom in savoy. The hope here is that they will rent out my apartment sooner rather than after my lease is up. then I wont be paying rent and mortgage at the same time. Lord knows i don't want to do that for very long.

On a completely unrelated topic, Zelle and I were at Meijer and happened across the clearance board games. I got 80s Trivial Pursuit for 3 bucks.... 3 freaking bucks!!! I was super happy about that.


Whoo! Ok now i just have to get all the unpacking done and finish up the Kanzashi.. then i can pack for Japan at the end of May... hmm this is truly a never ending cycle.

I thought that moving and having no time to pack was bad. But things are getting downright ridiculous now.

A coworker of mine died Saturday morning. Her visitation and all that is today. Work is going to be very very hard.

Sunday I was in Northern Illinois with my family visiting my Cousins and Aunt. My Aunt fell and It was EMT time. There was so much blood. we had to call an ambulance and get her to the hospital as fast as possible. I haven't been covered in so much blood in a long time. She has a couple brain injuries and is being sent to Madison to have a neuro-work up.

then there is class.


I am a little overwhelmed right now. And sleep is seemingly impossible. I know i need it though. I kind of want to scream. I need to make it to wednesday, once the move is complete then I can relax a little bit.

In the process of packing. You know between living at work and going to class. A bit stressed at the moment. I sign for my house on Monday then move into it on the 22nd. I am looking forward to this new step in my life. I am also looking forward going to Japan at the end of May. Basically way too much going on in a very short period of time. But its all working out well at the moment.


Ah yes time for the paranoia to set in.

Ah yes, it is March. The month where my parents disappear into Florida and i stay in Champaign. I don't mind watching the dog and the house, some days i wish i had the ability to vacation at least to go down there for a little bit, but then i remember I am saving my vacation time for a very good cause. March 14 is the deadline for the Japan trip. So soon i will know if it is a go or not.

My Japanese midterm is Monday. Not looking forward to it but i will do my best. I received the results of the JLPT and i missed the pass mark by two points.... thats right TWO FREAKING POINTS. I have decided that the JLPT is going down this year. I will pass the bastard! even if it means extra tutoring sessions with Kinoshita Sensei from now until December.

I got my two Tommy limited edition sets in the mail, they are HUGE. like 5 pounds of promotional stuff a piece. The sets are truly amazing. Plus it is great to have best of CDs and DVDs of her music videos for both of her solo personalities. I also got the recent release from Do As Infinity, a group that just recently got back together. They just released a best of Music Video DVD collection. It made me happy. I love to chill out and listen to their music.

So my computer got virus munched to all hell. Had to get it fixed and now it is back and better than ever. I even got a spiffy new monitor that is ridiculously large. I never really wanted a big monitor but now that i have one i probably would hate to go back to the smaller ones.

In recent me news... I will be joining the ranks of home ownership this year. should be interesting. Im still trying to figure out the whole government tax credit thing. but regardless of all that my offer was eventually accepted and I will be joining my brother in condo ownership. My brother will probably be horrified by price differences between the two condos, since he lives in Chicago. But it is a nice condo in a nice location and has plenty of space for me, I just need to do maybe two things to the place and it will be move in ready, assuming the furnace inspection goes well.

Life continues on its pace. I still havent heard about my JLPT results... not looking forward to that. But on the plus side my japanese instructor seems pretty positive that the Japan trip will be a go. Who knows this year might have some upswings afterall. Last year was certainly not a fantastic experience for me.

It is the new year, well for most of us... the rest will have new year the 26th. Yay year of the Ox. Anyway, it is a new year and that means new media obsessions!

Just started watching the j-drama Q.E.D. and i think i will like it. Another high school students solving crimes kind of thing but it works. Apart from the fact that Takahashi Ai may get a bit annoying in her bubbly yet shrill character, i think it will be a fun drama to watch. I am also getting into the next season of Vampire Knight, and even downloaded the Lucky Star OVA. lots to watch for sure.

In terms of music i have put in preorders for the new Koda Kumi album, Trick, as well as the two compilation albums from Tommy. The February6 one and the Heavenly6 one, they are appropriately oddly titled and i cant wait for my Limited editions and dvd's to get here!! Even though the Tommy stuff doesnt come out till February. *Sigh*

Classes start tomorrow which means starting the semester long wig out that is Japanese class. I am looking forward to it, i just know it will be painful just like last semester. The other thing in the works is a Trip to Japan. Application deadline is March 14 for the Parkland 2 week study tour in Japan. I hope enough people sign up so that the trip is a go. But i have come to grips with the possibility i may just have to go to japan on my own. Oh well i will keep my fingers crossed.

Merry Holidays to all, And may your New Year be happy or at least tolerable.

Finally a moment to breath. the JLPT and my Final are done. I dont believe i passed either. I have a long wait before i see my JLPT results. They apparently are sent to Japan to be graded, and wont be back till March. My Final on the other hand i will get back on Sunday when we are at Sensei's house.

My next "thing to look forward to" will be the Japan trip. Hopefully we will have enough people to go. But until then there is more studying. And trying to figure out correct grammar/sentence structure/verb tense so as to make myself understood fairly easily.

Oh good lord. The JLPT is Dec 7 and i feel so completely unprepared. It seems that no matter how much i study there is so much more to learn, and this test has study materials that are well made too. Some days i just wish i could sleep with a japanese text under my pillow and learn by osmosis. Oh well. The mad study dash begins... This week will be very long. Not only is it my long week to work but between studying for the JLPT and my Japanese Final for class, writing a speech in japanese and making sure everything is taken care of for the mini surgery the week after this, i think i am going to scream; but i dont have time for that at the moment. Oh well life goes on, and i am looking forward to the winter break... but not the weather of winter break.. cause that just makes work suck.

With the weather getting colder and less predictable it would be a good thing for people to start paying more attention when they are in their cars. Given that the weather will only get worse it just seems like taking some extra time to be cautious while driving would be a good idea. Cause really people cant drive as it is, dont make all those nice EMS people have to drag you out of a ditch on a snowy evening just cause you didnt feel like looking for ice.

I am not one to talk about politics. I generally stay away from any and all things political, especially partisan nonsense. But it really is imperative for people to get out and vote this year. I don't particularly care who you vote for, but try and remember to vote.

Besides, as my Dad always says, "If you don't vote, then you don't have a right to complain."

Another birthday comes and goes... This one will be spent at work.. then coming home and going to sleep since i work all weekend.

At time of writing it is 40 degrees outside. I love the fall weather change. My uniform is a bit on the uncomfortable and warm side so its nice to have the counterpoint of cool weather. The move to the apartment takes place tomorrow then my parents are leaving town so its back to their house to watch the dog.

Medical issues abound at the moment, myself, my dad, my brother... and none of them are good. I am so tired of health problems and getting bad news about things. I know it could be worse, but that really doesnt make me feel better when new information keeps coming in.

Early Saturday morning i am getting together with two of my classmates from Japanese class. The three of us will be attempting the lowest level of the Japanese Language Proficiency Test, in December, and are beginning the study process. It should be... interesting to say the least. I dont know if my Japanese stacks up that well but i suppose the JLPT would be the best way to test it. Maybe someday i can work my way up to the highest test, if you pass that there are certain perks when it comes to living in Japan. (other than knowing what people are saying to and about you)

Looks like im going to be stuck moving into an apartment that i really cant afford but am stuck with a lease for until july... great i can be EVEN MORE stressed out than i already am!!

the leased apartment still hasnt been signed over to another person... It is getting frustrating. I want my computer and all my books and dvds back, i am sick of my life being in boxes in the garage. Most of all i cant continue to live with my parents for much longer. I love them, they are great but it is almost as stressful to be around them all the time as it is at work. I get so frustrated with my Dad when he doesn't listen to me regarding medical stuff. I know im not a doctor but being around medicine your whole life and reading medical books, and being in EMS combined with common sense do actually come in handy. They make it so i can say to him that he needs to get some medical attention, then he blows it off and says he will be fine when that was not the case.

He got better, after a trip to the doctor, many blood tests, and an IV, and my parents didnt have to post pone their trip to Scotland. That is good cause they needed a break. They get back late tomorrow. But no sooner than they leave the country and my brother is calling me for medical advice. So for the last week i have been on and off the phone with him while he goes in and out of the ER and Doctors offices trying to figure out whats wrong. I wanted a break from everything so i took two days off work, thus giving me 7 days of freedom.... but no matter what i do to try and get a moment of relaxation it never lasts.

im tired, mentally mostly. I am tired of being on all the time tired of "sucking it up and dealing" I just want a freaking break. I want to not be paranoid that the next late night call i get is regarding a family member. I want my family members to stay out of the hospital, its like we are running a two for one around here. Ive been on edge about family illness since grandma died, which is understandable, and i want to take a break from it all. I dont want to be responsible about all this but i have to be.

Single again with many mental issues to deal with. But the Olympics have been interesting when i have time to watch them. I am tired from stress and lack of sleep but its kinda how things work for me. Soon i hope to find a place to live so i can move out of my parents house... since all my stuff is crammed into the garage and i cant actually access any of it.



EDIT: The break up was my decision and i went through with it, therefore i am doing just fine. I appreciate concern but really, if i wasnt fine with it or had some difficulty with it, i probably wouldnt have posted about it. It was a passing thing that needed to be dealt with and now i move on. Thanks to those who have expressed concern though.

SO with many many thanks to Strutz I am packed. with the exception of my computer cause lord knows i need my music to function. The computer is the last thing to be packed. They come to get my boxes at 2 then tonight i am going to see "Taming of the Shrew" in Bloomington. It is kind of tradition for Dad and I to go see a show each summer there. Saturday i will take as a day off for relaxing then back to the grind sunday cleaning my apartment. The lease is up the 31st and i intend to take the time that is needed in order to make sure i get my deposit back.


I have so much stuff, as strutz can attest to, but i threw alot of stuff out so that helps. i just want all this shit done so i can step back and take a breath. I move into my new place on Aug 8th, so till then i will be at my parents. I wont be online much.